Dr Ruth Ann Harpur

How to support a loved one in an abusive relationship Mar 01, 2023

It can be heartbreaking to witness a loved one going through this, and often there is a drive to advise them to get out of the relationship or to leave. If they have ended such a relationship, the urg...

From relational war to relational peace Feb 27, 2023

You may build up armour to survive when you have been through painful, abusive or consistently neglectful relationships. Perhaps you have learned to shut down and shut off. Maybe you have learned ...

How self-compassion supports self-responsibility Feb 22, 2023

We all make mistakes. We hurt ourselves, or we hurt someone else – and sometimes, we'll even do both. Such mistakes can often provoke our inner critic to scold or condemn us into changing. This usua...

Self-acceptance is the key to change Feb 22, 2023

None of us are simple, perfect creatures of light. We all have tricky parts of our personalities and patterns of behaviour that do not serve us. Many of us would prefer to push down, deny and ignore...

The problem with labels Feb 20, 2023

Narcissist? Empath? Healthy? Toxic?

We have all been labelled in some way or another at some point in our lives. But the truth is that each one of us has a unique tory to tell...

Make Love of Yourself Perfect Feb 17, 2023

The full quotation from Nisargadatta Maharaj is:

You are perfect, only you don’t know it.

Learn to know yourself and you will discover wonders.

All you need is already within...

How do you motivate yourself? Feb 15, 2023

What effect would it have on you if you had a coach who shouted at you, threatened you and punished you in an attempt to make you do better?

Would you hire such a coach? Probably not! ...

A Narcissistic Love Story Feb 14, 2023

To see a YouTube video on this, click here

Many contemporary stories echo ancient tales and hold resonance today. In "Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone", Dumbledore finds Harry transfixed by...

Why embracing uncertainty is the key to change Feb 13, 2023

I love this quote from theoretical physicist, Richard Feynman.

In my work with people who experience long-standing challenges in their relationships with themselves and the p...

Making friends with your anger Feb 08, 2023

Anger is often a good indicator that we, or someone we care about, is suffering the effects of something we consider to be unjust. This can lead us to ruminate, feel physically wound up and tense and ...

Why you should treat yourself as you would treat a good friend Feb 07, 2023

When things are difficult or challenging, it can be easy to turn the blame on yourself and fall into a spiral of harsh self-criticism.

How do you talk to your friends if they are facin...

Self-esteem vrs self-compassion Feb 06, 2023

Pursuing self-esteem can be a slippery slope; one minute you feel confident and successful, the next you could be crushed because of a mistake or failure. This kind of fluctuation in self-esteem i...

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